Where did I put my keys?

The other day I was reading a funny article on Google searches that made me realize how important Google is to people’s lives. In the article, the author, Rob, was explaining that he lost his keys and spent a long time looking for them around his home. Exasperated, he sat down in front of the PC and wondered why there wasn’t a “Google Key Finder.” Would anyone ever put in the search box, “where did I put my keys?” He then went to Google Keyword Tool to find out. Surprised, he found that the search for “where did I put my keys?” had an average of 72 searches by month. Don’t miss the opportunity to read that one, it’s hilarious.

Curiosity then got the better of me and I just had to have a look into Google Analytics to see what people who come to TrueBlood-News at The Nest were looking for. What I found were strange search queries which, while hysterical, have me remaining dumbfounded about what is in some people’s bright, funny and overall weird minds. Don’t believe me? See for yourself. (Remember, we just see the keywords, they are not anyway related to individuals.)

Questions people ask about Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer…

what does stephen know about anna paquin? (Hell if we know!)
what do stephen moyer’s kids think about anna?
was stephen moyer there while anna paquin filmed the scene with alexander skarsgard?
stephan moyer who is he engaged to? (C’mon you are the last person on earth who doesn’t know that!)
stephen moyer and anna paquin split (Say it isn’t so!)
are lorien haynes and anna paquin friends? (Sure, why not?)
anna paquin and michael moyer (Wait, does Stephen have a brother?)
lorien haynes and stephen moyer house for sale (Did you want to buy it?)

I want Bill's henley!

All you wanted to know about Stephen… and dared to ask!

where does stephen moyer’s henley shirts come from (Oh we know that one! Bentley’s, sweetie)
does stephen moyer and alexander skarsgard like each other (Seems like they do. But if they don’t… would Google know that?)
can stephen moyer actually sing (Hell yeah, very well!)
Stephen Moyer out and about in London (This question has been asked like 50 times…OMG someone is stalking Stephen!)

Alexander Skarsgard… that sexy beast!

alexander skarsgard interest in women
alexander skarsgard and black women
alexander skarsgård sock
alexander skarsgard lorien haynes (Wait! Someone is confused…or am I?)
alexander skarsgard likes to party
alexander skarsgard kissing anna paquin
alexander skarsgard and deborah ann woll dating (Whoa! This dude gets around!)
alexander skarsgard dating kristin bauer (Am I right or what?)

I had no idea they were dating!

Let’s get dirty ;)

alex skarsgard naked videos (Where? Where?)
sam trammell naked frontal (Again, where Google? Tell me!)
kristin bauer handjob (Oh my…)

Run Sam Run!

kristin bauer legs
“true blood” “doggy style” (Tempted to ask Google this myself actually)
nude bill compton (Be still my heart!)
sam trammell nude pics
rutina wesley tits (Oh c’mon, she’s smoking, why stop at her tits only?)
stephen moyer hot body (Agreed!)
sex with eggs – (Ok probably this question was not True Blood related!)
bill sookie handjob
anna paqin wearing nothing
so much nudity in true blood  (…And let the show go on!)

Google, the oracle (or genius?)

who does sam place his trust in? bill or eric?
what does alan ball mean by sookie and bill’s relationship will remain core of the show? (Yeah Google, what does that mean?)
can bill compton go outside in the day? (He can, but should he? Might be the better question)
can eric northman fly? (Ooh! I know that one! Yes!)
what does stephen know about anna paquin  (Sorry, I couldn’t help posting this one again!)
show me stephen moyer’s children (And make me rich you Google genius!)

You too can get the look

A bit of fashion

terrible makeup and hair in true blood
alan ball on why bill compton makeup is terrible in season 2 (Yeah, why why why?)
true blood dress up for the retarded  (Huh?)
anna paquin wears the same sandals every day (LOL! so do I…)
how to dress like eric northman (Tank top & flip flops; also be 8 foot tall Viking)
bill dressed like a slattern (Geez, I want to see that!)
what pants bill compton wear
what shoes does bill compton wear

Bill Compton

I want bill compton to never leave true blood (Neither do I!)
a bit of an idiot for a vampire bill compton
oh no bill compton (Are they looking for vampire claymation?)
bill compton looked good in last night’s episode (Are you searching or chatting with Google?)
does bill compton die in true blood season 3 (GOD…no!)
does bill compton have blue eyes? (Amazing deep blue eyes…use Google images!)
bill compton cheeks (Yep, nice cheeks ;)
silly things bill compton says (Like…?)
speak like bill compton  (How about, Suckeh! You awr mahn!)
“i am vampire, sookeh” (Yep you are!)

Some other unclassified rarities…

why is sookie stackhouse skinny (Latenight graveyard runs?)
anna pacquin is too skinny to be sookie (Send her some cookies instead of complaining :P )
anna paquin doesn’t like alexander skarsgard (Nooo?)
anna paquin don’t talk to alexander skarsgard (Ever?)
kristin bauer looks like angelina jolie (Personally, I don’t see it…wait, maybe around the lips?)
any trueblood news ( Tech Tip: no need to put “any”)
best way to get autographs at the greek theatre (Psst! Always at the door of backstage)
a new club in chicago like the one in true blood
is ryan kwanten anna paquin’s’ brother? (Uh, you mean in real life?)
eric northman wants to eat children (That’s what I heard too!)
true blood accent annoying (Try to listen to it in Spanish ;)
evan rachel wood and michael mcmillan dating? (Hmm, odd couple that would be!)
true blood pictures with eric and put yourself in them (Oh wow, cool!)

I refuse to believe...

AND THE WINNER IS…

sam trammell wig (Wait what??)

What are your favourites? Leave your comments below!!!!!!!!

Posted in Fangirls Speak Out, True Blood